As men, we have our routines, and we don't like it when they're disturbed. Any pressure to change is unwelcome. Unfortunately, different occasions call for different dress codes, and as much as you'd like to go to your best buddy's wedding wearing your favorite pair of jeans and a white T-shirt, you just can't.
It's time to shed some light on the appropriate dress code for some of the occasions and events you're most likely to have to attend.
Wedding
Not only is buying gifts a pain in the butt, but so is trying to figure out what to wear. The fact is that your dress will depend in part on the wedding, and whether or not you play a role in it.
If you're the best man, chances are the bride and groom will have already picked out what you'll be wearing. If your attire hasn't been chosen for you, then the basic rule of thumb is to look as good as you can without upstaging the groom.
What to wear: This usually means opting for a classic tuxedo. The same goes for black-tie affairs, even if you're not at the head table. If you don't own one, renting is pretty affordable. Expect to pay between $50 and $150 for a two-day tux rental. As with anything, shop around to get the best deal.
There are a variety of styles available for tuxedos nowadays. You can go with the classic bow tie and cummerbund look, or you can choose to be a little more daring and go for a vest and tie combo.
If you're just another guest and the wedding invitation said nothing about dress code, a nice suit and tie is your best bet.
Funeral
Unlike a wedding, the dress code at a funeral is the same regardless of your affiliation to the deceased. The idea is that you want your look to be subdued. Dressing appropriately is a sign of respect.
What to wear: Dark colored suits, such as navy, charcoal or black are the way to go. Avoid ties and shirts with loud patterns or bright colors. For example, a black suit with a white shirt and a simple burgundy tie is perfectly acceptable.
Make sure you're well groomed; the key word is neat. Finally, black shoes are recommended.
First date
What you wear on a first date depends on the gal and the locale. However, better to spring for a fancier venue if it means you can show off how good you look in your classy threads.
What to wear: There are a few fairly safe combinations you can put together. An open-collared shirt under a jacket is a good way to go. This option has the added bonus that if she gets chilly during the date, you can offer her the jacket to put over her shoulders. Another way to go is a wool or cotton sweater (crew or V-neck over a shirt).
In terms of pants, wool or cotton are both great options. If you're feeling a little adventurous, you can even go with corduroy. For a more laid-back look, a nice pair of trendy jeans can do the trick. Black leather loafers are a safe bet no matter where you're going. If you want to be trendier, spring for a suede shoe or a designer running shoe, like Diesel.
You'll want to add your favorite cologne to the mix. I suggest something along the lines of Jean-Paul Gaultier or Byblos to really make her melt.
Meeting the parents
Meeting the parents is all about the first impression. If you've got a quirky personality, now is not the time to let it show. Let them fall in love with you first, and then let them get to know you a bit better.
Chances are her dad is going to be looking for faults from the get-go, so don't be afraid to ask your girlfriend what he likes and what he doesn't like regarding fashion and style.
What to wear: You can't go wrong if you dress in a conservative manner. A good example would be a pair of khakis with a tucked in dress shirt or a polo shirt. You can choose between black or brown shoes, but leave the alligator skins at home for the day.
Being cleanly shaved is a plus. If you have long hair, make sure that it's not in your eyes all the time, because eye contact is very important.
A note about cologne: You may want to pass on it. Some scents may be a little bit too radical for your lady's parents, or they may even be allergic to it. A quick shower beforehand should do the trick just fine.
VIP lounge / nightclub
When you're hitting the clubs, you need to remember your objectives: to land a few ladies' numbers, or at least get in a few dances. In other words, dress to impress. You want to be trendy.
What to wear: Leave the faded jeans and sneakers at home if you want to be able to get into the trendy clubs. At the same time, don't look like you just came from the office. This is a good time to break out your vintage clothes or your patterned button-down shirts. You don't want to look uptight, so make sure you've got an open collar and your shirt isn't tucked.
Clubs, especially those that are packed with hot chicks who grind to the music all night, tend to get sweaty. Use cologne liberally, but not to the point where the girl dancing with you needs to crane her neck backward for fear of being asphyxiated.
A big part of looking good has to do with confidence and attitude, so don't look like you're trying too hard. Don't be that guy who's wearing shades when it's pitch black in the club. Leave the black spandex tee to the bouncer.
Job interview
Job interviews are tricky to dress for because what you wear can vary greatly depending on the company and the position. It's easy to come in underdressed and look unprofessional, or to come in overdressed and look like you're trying too hard.
What to wear: If you're interviewing for a prestigious corporate law firm, or for a position in the financial sector, there's no question that you should dress conservatively: dark suits and tasteful tie and shirt combinations. Over-the-top patterns are frowned upon, but a pin-stripe suit is both classy and sophisticated.
If, however, you're interviewing for a job with a new age IT firm, the suit and tie method may not be the best idea. Many of these companies, especially on the West Coast, have little to no dress code. For that kind of setting, a pair of trousers with a button-down shirt may be all that you need. Tucked in or not will depend largely on the corporate culture of the firm. Try to get some inside information from friends or acquaintances in the industry before your interview.
When in doubt, overdress. It is much easier to dress down while you're in the waiting room -- by removing your suit jacket, for example -- than to kick it up a notch if you're too casual. Make sure that you feel at ease in whatever you wear, as this will help you to remain relaxed, cool and confident.
Regardless of what job you're being interviewed for, it's important that you remain well-groomed. No one wants to hire a slob. Clean-shaven or neatly trimmed facial hair is essential. If you choose to wear cologne, remember that, in most interview settings, you won't be sitting close enough for the interviewer to smell it. If he does, that means you're wearing too much.
"Casual" events
Have you ever wondered what it means when you get an invitation to a dinner party or some other event and the dress code is "casual"? Or what about those "casual" Fridays at the office?
Let me define the word by telling you what it's not. It's not jeans and a T-shirt. It's not Bermuda shorts and a Hawaiian shirt. It's not even khakis and an untucked polo shirt.
What to wear: For a lot of men who don't have office jobs, dressing "casually" is actually dressing up, as opposed to dressing down. Casual actually describes the state of dress that comes when a man is dressed up, but not formal. For example, at a casual event, you could wear a jacket with an open-collared shirt. That jacket can even be of a light color. You can wear shoes that are not black, as long as they're not sneakers, and as long as they match your attire and are the same color as your belt.
Also note that at some casual events, it may be better to wear a tie. Once again, the tie can be of a light color and may be patterned. As always, if you're unsure about the tie, wear it; if you see that it's unnecessary, just take it off.
When speaking in public
Speaking in public can frazzle a lot of men. No matter how well you dress, it won't make you a great orator, but there are a few tips you can follow to make your life easier.
The key is to wear something that will relax your audience. Even the most attentive person will be distracted by bright colors and wild patterns.
What to wear: Instead of wearing that burnt orange tie, you may want to aim for the calming effect of cool colors, such as blue, green and gray (as opposed to warm colors such as red, orange and yellow). You also want to make sure that any stripes you choose to wear head in the same direction, preferably vertical, so that attention is drawn to your face.
If possible, go monochrome. Being dressed all in the same color is not only trendy, but it also focuses your audience's attention. Without any lines or breaks in color to catch their eyes, they have little choice but to focus on your words
